Bittersweet

It's been a while since I last blogged...

2008-12-26T10:29:00.001-05:00

...and posted photos.

That's because I am in dire need of a new camera. Geez, imagine a camwhore deprived of a camera. Well, anyway, since I used up all my Christmas money in parties, gifts (including something for me), eat-outs, and barely anything else that requires money, I'm not having any camera of my own. Still from my trusty ol' friend - camera phone and video camera. DAMN. I want my camera NOW (Baaaaad brat, haha...)

On the other hand, stopping rants, since it's the Holidays, I did have a heck of a Christmas time (read: eat, eat, eat. I am breaking the rule of thou-shall-not-weigh-more-than-thy-refrigerator, LOL), and now come New Year's, MORE reunions (family and friends alike) since Uncle Boy from US will be coming, my cousin will be christened, and more relatives to come and to meet this vacay. One helluva holiday break for me. And to think, I still haven't met everyone I should be meeting this Christmas. Daddy and the Angels, I am so missing you!!

But I still can't get my head out of left schoolwork, since I'll be facing it in a week's time. Imagine: skipped STS prelims, unapproved CST, still NINE more grueling days of RLE, physics is drilling hard on me, and MIDTERMS is so on January. I still have to face judgment of the battery exam, more exams (midterms and finals, and a cruel additional departmentals), more paperworks for RLE, data analyses, data presentation, and ANY OTHER academic whatnot I could think of.

HECK.

I wish it's always Christmas break.

I just wish SO.

P.S. Back to merry eating, hahahahaha

I'm off to a break. BONGGANG BREAK!

2008-10-11T09:51:00.000-04:00

Second Year First Semester
NOW SIGNING OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Woot! It is finally over! Five paining, headache-inducing, sleep depriving months! Loads of assignments, projects, OUTPUTS, interviews, paperworks, return demostrations! Oh yes! It's finally here! Sem Break! After all those, geez, somebody deserves a freaking damn vacation full of fun, SLEEP, night outs, sleepovers, movie marathon, reading favorite books, and...

WORKING.

Yes, for working. Earning. For personal and academic purposes - yep, need moolah for all the capricio and all. For night outs, for out-of-towns, for gadgets, for everything. Including TUITION FEE. Geez, I had an update thaEt tuition fee's escalating YET again. It's on the next semester though, but it's nice to invest now and to help your financier. And of course, all the extra cash would go for GIGS!!! Yipeeeeeee! Well, I guess, I'll have to spend this break working. Well, at least it's homebased, still have time for family and friends and gigs.

For all those, just two weeks, and off to second semester?! Need more sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!

*I'm not that keen of the Statistics Exam - I slept over last night, played DS and woke up late, so I guess I'm just reaping what I sow. SUCKS BIGTIME!!!! I was hoping for an A+++ for this subject. I hope Dr. Yap loses my paper and have me retake the exam. That would be ubergreat. IF ONLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dang!

Uy nagtampo

2008-10-10T02:56:00.002-04:00

Well, I hope not. I'll be frequenting the blogging business in quite a while because I had a work that concerns about blogs. Well, not maintaining one, rather contributing to one. I will not elaborate fully what my work is but what I know, I'm having extra cash and that is good. Plus that the topics I am going to write about is GADGETS. You know me all giddy about gadgets right? Seems like my obsession can be my profession. Ahehehehehehe, of course this is only short term, but I hope to do well here, and of course gain experience (parang RPG lang eh) and hopefully this would help to build my career in the future, I mean, that would be ubergreat right?

To more and more blogs!
*Still wishing blogging has a grade in school*

BLOG ALERT

2008-10-01T11:04:00.002-04:00

New blog @ 'Got game?' (click here)

So sorry for not updating so much, hope you still keep in touch.
Au revoire for now.
Ciao!

-Jonver

Got game?

2008-09-15T05:09:00.000-04:00

Today is the birthday of my new (errrr, second hand) Nintendo DS!!! [confetti, applause, hurrahs]

I still have no picture of it, but right now, it's on my lap. We're bonding. Stoked, totally stoked I am!!!! After being scammed, I developed anti-trust to any seller in eBay, but still good, honest, and people like Kring, still exist in the PH! I am really damn glad for this!!! To many mario and pokemon games!!! Ayiiiiiiiiie! Kinikilig ako! Hahahahahaah

NO SLEEP

2008-09-10T12:06:00.000-04:00

RLE days are on Thursdays, so.....

Every NURSING STUDENT has the least privilege to sleep, especially if you're not done with your paper works or you have your return demonstration (fondly retdem) or you haven't been able to do you WRITTEN assignments (whatever happened to THE modern age?). Wednesdays are no-sleep nights.

So the only best thing to do is to keep yourself awake. DO NOT EVEN TRY TO TEMPT YOURSELF TO GO NEAR THE BED IF YOU WANT TO PASS. For a student like me who have been cramming his way since the day he learned to, THE BED is the no-no place to be. Plus, add to that that I have a severe attention deficit problem. Ergo, being in the bed for at least 15 minutes would mean that I will have been, most likely, slept my whole night. I WILL NOT FINISH A THING. My best friend when these times come - ESPRESSO.

Come to think of it, I love it when I have all the excuses in the world just to overdose my favorite beverage. I came to realize that saying affogato (spelled right?) will hype up your drink with a shot of your favorite espresso. CAFFEINE OVERDOSE. YEY! It just rush up all the endorphins and adrenaline in my body - the perfect mood for working overnight for the papers.

And yet again, I had myself caffeinated. It has been another Wednesday night again. It's Thursday before I know it.

I wonder when will I have good-night-Wednesdays.

Maybe never. Good! More espresso!

BLOG UPDATE

2008-09-05T12:41:00.001-04:00

Where did I go wrong?
Uninteresting Bowel Sounds

You are so much welcome to visit. Feel free to comment in any of my post, God bless y'all. Ciao!

Yet another effin' seller

2008-09-05T12:07:00.002-04:00

As I try to walk out of the mall, still stressed, got a lil' sleep in the couch at the mall, feeling dizzy and all that, I found myself sniffing the aroma of my favorite beverage and make a hundred and eighty degree turn to my favorite place on earth. I found solace in sipping a shot of espresso on a bed of caramel and cream and I concluded to just move on. I cannot think more of it and I just viewed it as one effin' moment where you are allow to freak out everytime it happens. Damn it!

I mean it sucks, being a victim the second CONSECUTIVE time around, I should be
under trauma or should developed a phobia, but I should not. I mean it's just stuff that I should be letting it pass, I am just having a bad time that's all. Truth is, kinda depressed here and frustrated. I want it to be reversed. I want revenge. I want to take back what's done. I want to turn back time. I want it to end.

But as I went out the mall, walked a good mile or two, it just occurred to me, I am just the damn like them when I do that. I walked happy and rode the jeep to the jam and let it all breathe out of my system.

They surely will have their rewards.

[freaking scammed]

Juggling work and play

2008-09-01T06:03:00.003-04:00

I promised myself once that I would balance work and play in my life. Apparently, play has been dominant in my life, as in 85% dominant (well, forgive the stats) and I've been doing not all the efforts to achieve that darn balance in my life.

And to account for, I bought a DS at eBay and who knows it will be all play for me.

But I have these case studies, return demonstrations, research proposals (well, not that serious though), more paper works, exams ahead and I BOUGHT A THANG THAT WOULD MAKE IT WORSE?

Sometimes, I can't understand myself.

*But certainly, I love my DS, it's coming tomorrow, yey for me!!!!! =D

After a year or so, I am back

2008-08-29T12:19:00.002-04:00

I really am back, I now regained access to my once beautiful, now rotting and then-defunct blog, yey!

Will be writing more blogs in the coming days. Still have loads of school work to do.

Checklist:
Physical Assessment
Health Interview
Midterms on all subs
Report on Statistics
Weekly [killing] quizzes on Anatomy
and many more.....................

How I wish blogging has a grade. LOL

Hehehe

An "A+" for a Major Subject isnt bad...

2005-12-07T00:54:00.000-05:00

I've got it... Thank God!!

When you know you have something in common…

2005-09-30T23:49:00.000-04:00

<------- that would be me!

Another great discovery I’ve made thru the years of my existence. Never in my wildest dreams that I will be somehow linked to him.
I know this might sound, again, crazy. For how many blogs I have sounded crazy, still I sound crazy.

We have the same birthday!

Paolo Bediones

A genius of the time being, purportedly dubbed as Philippines’ Reality TV King, Paolo Bediones is indeed another Pisces. I admit. He is one of my idols. Graduating from one of the most prestigious (and posh; well it is ATENEO that made him somehow) schools, a successful career man, a male underwear model with a very irresistibly lean (read: lustful) body and perhaps one of the much-sought bachelor; this 31 year old (he doesn’t look 31) celebrity-journalist had gone so far beyond his dreams (as told by him.) I can’t even imagine why we became birthday-mates. Can’t think of the time being if it has some astrological, zodiacal, tarotic, or just plain luck that we hit the same birthday (maybe I’m the one who sit in March 17, since he’s older than me.) Otherwise, he is one of my all-time TV personality favorite. Celebrating with him the whole 17th of March would be my honor and pleasure.

I just want to give it a, somehow, greater meaning. Like, if I will be of somehow like him. Perhaps, even I will not enter Ateneo, still, it’s ‘spendthrift’ counterpart would be my school. And I still want to pursue Broadcasting just like him. But, oh puh-lease, let’s omit the words ‘underwear model’ and I don’t want to disappoint people over the television. Whew, stop dreaming. But according to “PAO” (as if we’re close… oh how I wish) it is to stop dreaming that he fears most. AND, oh I forgot, we both read DAN BROWN.

Five months to go and it’s our birthday. Half a year planning could be considered a long time preparation for my ‘dream’ birthday bash with Pao. An ‘EXTREMELY DIFFERENT EXTRA CHALLENGE.’ Instead of the usual eat-the-yucky or extreme heights challenge in the nearby county or country, I want to have an unusual challenge with him. Perhaps, traveling the Museé de Louvre, the museum that contains almost all the most famous artworks of the old and new world. We’ll be trying to re-enact Da Vinci Code. I’ll be Langdon, he’ll be Sauniere (perhaps because he’s older and he’s lustfully lean) and Miriam would be Neveu. I am somehow frustrated about their supposed-to-be loveteam and when Ms. Beauty Queen married and migrated to HK, Pao lost a fortune. Well, this ‘dream’ challenge would somehow liven up what died years ago, when it’s still ‘Extra Extra’. Since it’s not only MY birthday on March 17, he should also contribute to what we can do on a most special day. I can’t actually read Pao’s mind but, I think whatever it is he will suggest, it will be most beautiful considering the challenges at Extra Challenge is 70% his mind, I can’t underestimate his thinking.

In any way, there should be a hidden (like in Da Vinci Code) link to why we are born the same date (even though not the same year.) But it most likely seem that I’m just easily absorbed to Da Vinci!

PS: To those who read Dan Brown… just wanna tell you that he’s working on another Robert Langdon story… it’s still not yet in the market, it’s reportedly a two-year research story… I am not giving the synopsis, I’ll be spoiling Langdon on your side!

DARNA and Life’s Hurting Truth…

2005-09-20T22:31:00.000-04:00

Life depicted in limelight is fab and glam. Darna just proved she’s different.

Tonight’s episode of Darna flung me as I see it as an illogical television show. However, it redeemed itself somehow just this night. Life’s hurting truth was at last depicted in the idiot box, the one I’ve been looking for. Hey, even if I am addicted watching TV, I choose programs (perhaps deleting the word idiot from the aforementioned words!)

One’s greatest enemy is himself (in Darna’s case, herself.)

Although presented in allegory, Darna’s innerself literally divided – the good and the sinister Darna. After which, the evil one attacked her counterpart. Maybe tired of punching and kicking and slapping and physically hurting each other, good ol’ Darna requested the other to stop, emphasizing that evil Darna should not exist, should not be born but is born because of hurt feelings and grievances. Turning the tables, the evil reflected the request with the story why she exists. The pains, the thoughts that evoke her, the reality that she really exists could never be denied. While she pointed out the instance of why she was born out of the other, Darna interferes. She couldn’t bear to listen anymore.

Realizing that her enemy is herself – they have the same powers, the same strengths, the same weaknesses, the same thoughts, the same secrets. We all know that what we know and what we hide can be something of use against us. That could never be wronged. But, what if what’s inside you attacks you and there’s no chance of winning. How would you win with a person that you created, you bore out of your mind; the one you created so finely that you yourself, the maker, can’t even eradicate. After we developed ourselves, chiseling every edge of our abilities to be of better to everyone else, it will prove futile when we face the greatest enemy of all – none other than what you think.

We always glare at the devil when something bad happens to us. When we lose our jobs, we call our bosses the infamous demonyo; when your sons go to drugs or something bad, you call them demonyito; and when someone did something unforgivably and terribly wrong, the police longs for their presence behind the bars, they say their under the possession of the devil. I feel pity of the devil. While he is incapable of doing anything to you but suggest thoughts, we oftentimes put the blame on him. He suggests we do. So what did he do? He actually did nothing but to pester you, but YOU do the wrong, its your enemy – YOU!

Not that I defend the one being responsible for the fall of man, but isn't it quite awkward when we always says it’s the devil’s work. Why would he do it to us while he knows Christ died for us and saved us already? Of course, he could do nothing but to tell you what to do, it’s your responsibility to shut your ears and avoid it. But what do we do… we go to his lair, lavish SIN and tell everyone that he’s in control. HECK! We are in control… God gave us free will thus, no one could ever decide for us and do things for us but none other than OURSELVES.

We can never blame anyone for anything that happens to us. We make our future. We can never tell that we never chose to do this and that because it’s our free will that takes place. We decide always. If anything happens to you… IT IS ALWAYS YOUR FAULT. Never did anyone fault anyone’s future.

Are you mature and person enough to shoulder what you do? Think first.

The Numbers Game...

2005-09-09T02:10:00.000-04:00

Why do everytime DEMOCRACY is being talked about – it is always told that the majority wins? My question: what if the majority is wrong, do they still win?

If you’ll look at the dictionary what democracy means you will see the word free first. And if you’ll dig deeper at it, it’s the Greek word DEMOKRATIA that it came from. DEMOS that means “people” and KRATIA that means “rule”. Thus, RULE OF PEOPLE… But it seems like what happened in the congress two days ago is the RULE OF MAJORITY.

Majority does not always win. You see, WE ARE humans, not excluding the alleged legislators of the country. As humans ONLY, we commit mistakes sometimes. “HONORABLE” CONGRESSMEN, you are not GODS, you are also humans like us. So if we say that DEMOCRACY IS WHAT THE TRUTH IS AND NOT ALWAYS ABOUT MAJORITY WINS, it might be a better explanation – coz democracy isn't all about freedom ONLY but also of truth. Bet you aren’t aware of the Bible verse that says THE TRUTH SHALL SET US FREE.

If the people don’t believe that the recent IMPEACHMENT proceedings is relieved of faultiness and thus represents VOX POPULI, you can’t blame them to go to the roads, their last resort. What really happened at the congress is a mere NUMBERS GAME. I DARE MOCK all congressmen who voted to trash the impeachment complaint. Just only because there’s nothing really different about us – we’re both humans and we’re both Filipinos. The only panel who had decided last September 6 is only the majority bloc. We were not heard. Apparently, it is only the 158 congressmen who decided about it. Have they dared to ask their respective constituents, who put them in where they are, about their vote? We know that it is not the RP who invented CORRUPTION to cry out loud, but what we howl is that we’ve had enough.

Now, does democracy rely in numbers?

As long as I’m blogging, you’ll never read that majority wins. It is against my NATURE. Since high school, I loathe that “majority wins” thing, coz I know that it is not always the right thing. Sometimes, minority is VOX DEI. Democracy was made, I believe, to promote freedom. With freedom, comes along truth. Even if it hurts and doesn’t sound like it’ll free you for the fact that it (truth) will sometimes put you to JAIL, it still frees. The truth shall set us free. It’s a maxim, an age-old general rule and principle; never a CLICHÉ. For it will never be overused, as long as freedom is suppressed it will remain true that truth really sets free.

Well, I think, democracy does rely in numbers… at least in its FILIPINO VERSION.

She has Two Hands

2005-09-09T00:43:00.000-04:00

Child’s play. That’s what happened in the impeachment complaint hearing. Completely child’s play – a simple numbers game. Is the government laid in the mercy of mere numbers? Or is it still TRUTH that reigns the nation? The culprit has two hands stuck out to us.

One is the left hand of reconciliation. That is, at least, what she said. However, as long as I am concerned, that hand has gloves – rubber gloves (because, she’s to CLEAN up her mess, she’s going to UN). Along with it is the infuriating hypocrisy that she’s happy to RECONCILE. Of course, the heck, no! No dragon would leave his prey alive. Of course, she’s going to slap that hand that she stuck out to us… to let us feel WE LOST… to a cheater, stealer and liar. Well, it’s a fact that the IMPEACHMENT lost in the congress somehow. She’s to slap us with all “HUMILITY” that she never get what she wants (“…take your grievances to congress…” courtesy of Madame Fake President) and thus she’s too humble to rule and we lost. Well, it’s not humility after all. TOTAL AVOIDANCE.

Another is the right hand to grab more blood cash and perhaps to still have phone-pal moments with her beloved COMELEC Commissioner “Garci”. Actually, she isn't that corrupt, but the fact she earns TAXES a.k.a. blood cash out of being the so-called president of the Republic, I think it’s pure corruption in its best in the hands of an electoral cheater and a fraudulent president. Haven’t she realized that the more blood cash she gets, the more BLOOD her hands get. The more blood, the more “Karma” she has to pay. Not that I believe in Karma, but perhaps it’s a reflection of the Bible’s Golden Rule. Do unto others what you want other to do unto you. The blood represents people, she bares the people of what they paid in the tax, and if she ever has to pay – her blood is “insufficient in form and substance.” Why doesn’t she pay as early as now, to at least lessen in what she has to pay more – RESIGN! Do not let more people waste sweat and blood to kick her out of her lair. If she resigns, then she might at least atone for what she’s done. IT’S ALSO FOR HER GOOD, YOU KNOW. She isn't really a loser, in fact, she saves herself from total humiliation and thus prove that she LOVES this nation – as what she will present in the UNITED NATION’S SECURITY COUNCIL – that she LOVES us very much! I will even shake hands with her if she do that – to congratulate that she’s done the right thing.

And now that she’s nearing to UN Security Council Meeting, what hands shall she show? (if I see a different hand, she might be Shiva!)

Officially In Business

2005-09-08T02:22:00.000-04:00

Can you imagine what I got this month? No one could ever guess…

Well, it’s a whopping P22,000 fat paycheck for my allowance for a year. Wow, that totally surprised me. Can’t get anything to buy til now. Oh shut up, Jonver, it’s for your studies. Biz could be a better alternative than spending all those blood cash from my Mommy, she’ll surely kill me instant the instant she knew I would spend it – NO HOLDS BARRED. (When will it come, my shopping spree worth 50 million?)

Stop howling the pyramid scam or even investments, I’m too young for that. I’m only 16. I decided to have a LOADING AND DOWNLOAD STATION for SMART. I know it will be a hassle finding customers especially in the way life plays with people, but if I won’t do anything within the remaining months before the second semester, I might as well as commit suicide due to boredom. Besides, it will be a good avenue to generate income… and keep my mind tingling. I couldn’t afford to lose an IQ point, I’m in 115 – average! Instead of keeping in watch of the president’s (why did I call her that!) plasticity and hypocrisy, I should at least learn to generate MONEY from my own blood to at least survive. Not later, the oil price could hit 50 and the dollar a hundred, I couldn’t take a chance to go hungry.

I’m tired of being a big bullshit in my ‘rents shoulders. I’m tired of living in my old cobwebby dirty room. I gotta get out and LIVE! I could not take another minute without doing anything. BOREDOM would drive me crazy… so I wanna live out loud, as the many youth and young at hearts like me – people who hates boredom the most.

As I drool, dreaming of my future life, I couldn’t think of anything else but how to sell my initial P500 load for E-Load. (Can’t say anything else, someone might steal my ideas.)

I sketched my DREAM FUTURE in my magic mind slate like a kid with his magic pen and slate. I’m going to take Practical Nursing this semester. After two years (which I would probably finish Nursing) I’ll go to my dream school – of course none other than UNIBERSIDAD NG PILIPINAS, and take Broadcasting. Some say about my idea is – it’s crazy to study again, aren’t you tired studying? – although I admit it really is.

That is, if I did not, once again, entered the United States thru the course I took. Nurses nowadays in the Philippines are earning not more than eight thousand lil’ bucks. How am I supposed to LIVE OUT LOUD if I would have that income and the kind of job that will eat all my time and not mentioning half of my life? I was a kid then when I told Mommy that I want to take up Medicine, but I guess times change so as people’s minds – I am now eyeing for Mass Communications. I don’t know but maybe it’s the drive of my peers (Raf and Jampz – both are writers and in UP) that I suddenly wanted this course. I was so vocal in the Medicine thing, I didn’t think this would ever happen. To those who know me, I know I write bad, but that is the main reason why I want to study: to achieve what I never achieved, to learn what I never learned and to serve my passion beyond my limit. For me, that is the essence of learning – LEARN what you don’t even know. Education educates not those ‘who know’ but those ‘who do not know’. For it is the main purpose of education –TO TEACH.

And maybe after I took up what I like, I might work at long last. If ever luck hits beside me, it would be even greater… give me a million… I’ll own a condo! My dream house isn't really a house but a condominium unit. I WANT A CONDO IN ORTIGAS, PRONTO! And if LADY LUCK would grant me two more wishes, I’d wish for my own set of hi-tech apparel (My mac, with its partner PDAs with Wi-Fi around the unit and what could luck ever give me) and the best work in the land. That isn't bad, whaddya think?

I enjoy daydreaming – though you could think that if reality bites, the wounds could be deep. Lady Luck will always be in fiction never in reality. For everything you earn have its own sacrifices. You won’t get anything unless you give off something in exchange. That’s the balance of the world, no one can ever change that. What you do will have its own consequences, no matter what. Never a man succeeded that has not given off something in exchange. And if life really is very unfair – the trade could also be unfair.

Could LADY LUCK struck our country, GMA’s out of position… PRONTO! (How I wish very dearly!)

Murder is a MORTAL sin!

2005-09-06T01:42:00.000-04:00

We saw it all, from start to end, and no one but dimwits can ever say that it is the truth. We are cheated once again.

The remaining LEGAL action one can do to oust that woman (You-know-who) out of office was KILLED in front of all the people of the Republic of the Philippines. And can we ever say that is it still legal? They killed, and then they committed a crime because MURDER is a crime.

Stop being politically correct, Madame Fake President is in control of everything. All was in favor of her. Now, the impeachment was killed, then the E-VAT will be implemented shortly after (although E-VAT would help the nation grow; it should be never implemented in a country like the Philippines – inhabited by corrupt politicians, they would surely grab all that blood cash.) She is never concerned with her people, whether they suffer or not – all she thinks is her position as the commander-in-chief of this nation. She is an economist, so she should know by now that these happenings would even deprave more our country. From impeachment to rallies. She is SO selfish! It was beyond reasonable doubt what she all wants is to retain her position and SHAME. If she isn't selfish, she would RESIGN and relieve this nation from all the shame and poverty. But, no, she isn't SELFLESS to do that.

And now, the people have just only one option – to bring all of these to the roads, causing more economic distress, more unemployment rates, more PHISIX downfall and more peso devaluation. And we know that these militants and activists won’t stop unless they get what they want. And we also know that GMA would not care enough for this country to resign, because she knew that she wouldn’t grow hungry if she don’t resign but her people. She actually isn't affected with all of these.

I recommend that she should be given the JFK treatment. JFK doesn’t deserve the assassination but she does. However, it isn't right and thus it could bring more economic distress. She is intelligent, no doubt, but she isn't righteous to govern this country. I COULD NOT STAND THE REMAINING FOUR YEARS WITH HER! I could not wait for the next election.

It is indeed a glorious day for her, but for the many people who want her head, sorrow struck. Anyways, she shouldn’t celebrate so early, she don’t know what the people can do. She should consider that the people can be so sober and could be also crazy. From her head to satires, that’s what the people can do.

HER HEAD CAN BE MY DÉCOR IN MY ROOM. IT’S PRETTY FASHIONABLE!

YOUTH R.A.G.E.

2005-09-04T00:28:00.000-04:00

I just can’t get enough sleep last night that I woke up so late for my agenda today. The rendezvous at JILCF is seven in the morning; well, I woke up seven also. And all I can think of is YOUTH R.A.G.E. Can’t think of any event today, all I planned for today is to worship and to worship and to worship the one true God.

I prepared for at least 15 minutes, I left the house half past seven. And oh boy, am I so unlucky. I rode a jeepney that in my own opinion is no faster than 15 km/h. Why would drivers like that dimwit appear when I need to race against time? I just can’t shout that I’m in a hurry coz I would sound selfish, and I couldn’t take all the minutes wasted while there’s a gang waiting for me. I’m stuck – in time and situations. Well, as I mutter ‘oh no, I’m late’ and other cranky expressions just to tell him indirectly I’m in a hurry, I spent 20 full wasted minutes for just four insignificant kilometers, I just can’t get it why would I have to feed scumbags and bozos like that jeepney driver. Well, at least I’m a bit gratified with the next driver, he’s fast and he’s furious. I must thank the Lord for his life for he saved me from complete embarrassment to my co-posses. I arrived half past eight and I were the last person to arrive. And, whew, they were still there!

Be ready to be revived, the house is ON FIRE! International Worship Institution-Youth RAGE really burnt the Tanghalang Francisco Balagtas or the more commonly known as Folk Arts Theatre with God’s all-consuming fire. Regardless of the humid atmosphere inside the edifice, Youths are really on fire with worshipping the one true God. Darrel Evans, much sought-after worship leader of the generation, began with “I’m Free” that really fills my heart with so much gladness. Remembering that we (Faith Trax) danced it last Wednesday, also it really symbolized how free youths worship God. With the topic, God wants to be near YOU, it did ignite the first part of the confab. Ptr. Jerome Ocampo discussed intimacy with God and what it can do. I can still remember his stories how God favored him during his trips in the US. How God use ANYTHING just to let you feel you’re always special. How would that favor change the nation!

Enter Congressman Emmanuel Joel Jose Villanueva. One of the many congressmen who support the impeachment complaints against Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo and the National Chairman of Kristiyanong Kabataan para sa Bayan (Christian Youth for the Nations). Honestly, this is my fave part; being your official politically correct student I deliberately liked the act of Congressmen Joel imparting the very juicy substance on the real deal on the impeachment hearings. Are you aware that the admin congressmen paid supposed signatories a vacation to other countries just to be absent on the deadline date of the impeachment hearings? We knew that those admin congressmen were sinister but this is beyond the line. Bribery should be penalized with death penalty. For this crime DESTROYS our nation, feeding corrupt politicians and stuffing their wallets with plenty of cash – blood cash from people’s taxes.

Enough of scum politicians. I had enough of them.

"Expertly saying..", by the Love Guru

2005-08-31T20:38:00.000-04:00

Heart is the most deceiving as the Bible says; but I say, the heart must numb itself after being deceived.

Have yourself fooled about love, and after all you invest love to that person… er… uhm… secretly… that person will just trash it all and you found yourself locked up in your own room, crying and throwing every china you see; then all of a sudden you want chocolates (while you hated it coz it will cause you to bloat) and you don’t find the slightest reason why you just want to erase all the text messages sent by the culprit; and then you said you’re okay! Wow! What love can do; I can’t believe it blinds and it paralyzes. I’ve been in love with a person (of course!) but I haven’t gone all thru these foolishness and crankiness, although cranky is my name. But haven’t I realized that, even once, people have so much love for one person that they went insane when that girl/boy they like get screwed up or got on with someone, especially if they were secretly loving the person. What’s with it. I don’t understand.

I have a friend whose love struck with a guy I know and befriended with. So I bring her updates of that guy. And I wasn’t aware that she already loved that person much, even though that guy doesn’t know her. (I’m tired of typing ‘guy’, I’m gonna reveal his name… his name is Maht and the gal is Pat… aren’t they compatible.) Lately this last Sunday, I was told that Maht was with someone and were already courting and dating. Actually and frankly, I find it difficult to tell her the truth, I am afraid of her reaction. The day I feared came and I don’t know where does the courage to tell her came from but I actually told her the truth. She screamed intensely that the floor we’re in can hear it. Tears was falling from her cheek. This is the first time I saw her like this. Sad, freaked out and angry. She was then full of life, witty, and well, in loved. But now as I look at her, she was so down and I can feel her blank heart and face from the, so far, greatest tragedy of her life.

As me and her bestfriend tried to comfort her, she was crying nonstop. We can actually do nothing but to be a crying shoulder or to be her hanky (in case she needs to blow, that is, eeeeeeeew… Pat your “uhog”!) She hugged me and pretended to be my lil’ sis and she told me, “Kuya, sapakin mo sya para sa ‘kin, paramdam mo sa kanya kung pa’no nya ko nasaktan” (Chastise him for me, let him feel what pain he gave me.) I answered, “Pa’no ko sa kanya ipaparamdam na nasaktan ka nya eh hindi ka nga nya kilala” (How can I ever chastise him, while you were loving him secretly; he doesn’t know you either.) That caused only her to cry more. I guess I said the wrong phrase for her but that’s the painstaking and undisputed truth. Her hair was wet with perspiration, her eyes was red for crying and her hands were flying thru the wall; maybe she’s imagining that was Maht’s face. I can do nothing but to tell her that it wasn’t the end of the world, it was just the end of one phase of her life. But… it is useless. We knew she CAN be mature at these things but she can’t seem to get a hold of herself. Just like she was under in some kind of spell and she couldn’t use what she was thought what she was before – a LOVE GURU.

But now, the tables are turned and it’s my turn for being the Love Guru. I have been many times – teen break-ups, simple quarrels to the hardest of all – this one. At this time, I’m torn between: Pat (for her absolute invested love for Maht) and Maht (for he never knew someone was loving him that much.) So can somebody tell me, who’s right. For me… it was never wrong to love someone secretly but be very PREPARED for what will happen. You’ll never know when that guy/gal will love somebody and be committed and eventually tied up with someone other than you. It could be painful, but look at it; the Lord loved us but no one has been able to return it. I always say this when this happens: it is his/her lost not yours. Someone lost someone loving him very much, but you never lost someone because he/she never loved you! That is simple logic. But love…hears no logic… it is plain dumb and stupid. Expertly saying, she was too young to love Maht, she was 14 and Maht was 17. She would just never lose at this because she was young and she can pull it up.

After hours of consoling her, I brought my sister (the real one, blood-orientedly) to the dentist. Her tooth was killing her and I was the one being waked up every night because she needs to take TYLENOL for that very tooth is hurting. I ended it up, I brought her to the dentist and left to the dentist all of it. I told the dentist to do ALL necessary actions, how painful it could be. To know that all she had was one holed tooth and cavities causing bad breath, wow, I have sleepless nights for that.

She is now eating bags of chocolate, and I can do nothing about it.

Talk about LEGAL MURDER...

2005-08-30T18:38:00.000-04:00

That does it! I’m full and tired of it. This is already falsity right before my eyes. I’M FED UP.
This goes beyond what the constitution says; this is already about the truth. The recent attempted killing of the impeachment of President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo is deceit in broad daylight. The JUSTICE committee is very confident of committing treachery and betrayal of its people. I feel raped as a Filipino.
False Alarm, you say Mr. House Speaker? Yup, it should be a false alarm. Then why does your justice committee prevented the amended complaint knowing that it’s better and well-prepared by the impeachment team? Isn't that killing half of the impeachment process? And what’s the other half; “killing” the nine more signatures needed to bring it to the senate? Depriving the truth from prevailing, is that the spirit of the constitution that you said you were defending? Aren’t you wrong, you’re not defending the constitution but the one woman who sustains your position!

But if that man and the administration congressmen will defend that the constitution says that there can be no two IMPEACHMENT PROCEEDINGS. Hello? Are you really lawmakers? Can’t you understand the meaning of proceedings and complaints? The one’s up is the complaints, there are still no proceedings yet, then why does they continue to cite that part of the constitution? They’re just rationalizing, and that means they’re really wrong because they end up with a wrong reason. And please, HONORABLE (ironic) CONGRESSMEN check your law books and the constitution itself, you are missing quite some important notes… or maybe you should go back to grade one and finish the dictionary.

Undisputed walkout and hurling impeachment papers are what the opposition block answered the justice committee. Hey, what do you expect them to do, be VERY happy? The majority block KILLED the DUE PROCESS, so what justice still remain? Maybe I’m being one-sided but sorry I see no right with siding with the scumbag majority.
They say that the majority always wins. But in my opinion, it is not always as the majority tends to abuse their number and sometimes, although that the minority can be counted in one’s hands’ fingers, they’re the ones who are right. Like in the congress, THE MINORITY IS TELLING THE TRUTH but the problem is the majority is very numbered so they can pull the decisions up to their untruthful discretion. Isn't it falsity in its best in the congress? The majority of the very people who are to legislate and are expected to a truthful commission are committing falsity in broad daylight. Treacherous as it can be, politics is now showbiz: just for the sake of show!

As my favorite congressman said: this is no longer a battle of legal matters but this is already a moral battle. STOP PILFERING THE TRUTH FROM THE PUBLIC! To the majority block, save your soul from immorality and let the truth prevail, even if it real hurts (and your pockets will real hurt also coz there would be no one bribing YOU!).

Could we...

2005-08-29T23:42:00.000-04:00

Stop for a moment to pray for those who are in need...

THE WORLD NEEDS OUR PRAYERS...

RIGHT NOW!!!

What should we all be thankful for...

2005-08-29T23:30:00.000-04:00

He who labors diligently need never despair; for all things are accomplished by diligence and labor.

"I felt very fortunate to live in this part of the world.I promise I will never waste my food no matter how bad it can taste andhow full I may be. I promise not to waste water. I pray that this littleboy be alleviated from his suffering.

I pray that we will be more sensitive towards the suffering in the worldaround us and not be blinded by our own selfish nature and interests.I hope this picture will always serve as a reminder to us about howfortunate we are and that we must never ever take things for granted.

Think & look at this...when you complain about your food and the food wewaste daily..." MAY ALL BEINGS BE FREE FROM SUFFERING!!!!Please don't break this and keep on forwarding it to all our friends. Onthis good day, let's make a prayer for the suffering in any place around the globe andsend this friendly reminder to others.

I have the mind of Congressman Cayetano...

2005-08-29T01:27:00.000-04:00

I think I can’t say this straight… OMG… I can’t! No, this is too much! Oh okay…

I have the mind of Congressman Alan Peter Cayetano of RP.

Remember my article about the big waltz with the president and that endless impeachment dispute? For those who didn’t, please read it first. I might sound airheaded if you don’t.

If you’re a news junkie, then you’ll possibly encounter Mr. Cayetano’s wise sayings. And one of those was a part of my previous articles here in my blogs. Damn proud of it. I wouldn’t even think that I would say what a congressman (one of my faves and a good one!) might say one day! And I’m damn proud of it. Couldn’t think that he would say that.

I say: ‘the president herself said that we take our grievances to congress, and now that it’s there, why do they prevent the going and make it tough? Aren’t they too obvious that the president is really faulty?’ And as of now – this very right hour – he said almost the same thing in Diyos at Bayan @ GMA7. Congressman Cayetano, as the spokesman of the impeachment team is flaming silently in front of famous reverend and bishop Bro. Eddie Villanueva, saying these things.

WE’RE (Congressman Cayetano and of course ME) ACTUALLY AND BASICALLY RIGHT!

Yes, the president was too confident to say it straightly that we take our grievances to congress because she knew her allies could build walls so quickly, hindering every good move of the impeachment team. Instead of thinking what the mass really needs now (that is the truth) they just waste time voting for prejudicial questions and delaying tactics for the DUE PROCESS the whole nation is waiting for. Do we need to whip and flail every ADMINISTRATION congressmen to spit and do the truth just like the old times? Oh come on, this is the 21st century! My God, they are being paid to legislate the country good and not to protect someone just because SHE is paying them extra attention and special mentions. Public servants serve the masses NOT the president. They are not in the position to lie because they are being paid for the TRUTH.

THIS IS NO GAME OF CHESS. That whoever loses can just take time practicing again. Crisis IS the game. The oil price is the game, the dollar rate is the game. We are gambling national crises and pride here! And what are they doing? Sitting around happily and luxuriously while delaying the impeachment. ADMINISTRATION CONGRESSMEN, hello? I might be just as young as 16 years old, but it’s not quite a reason to DISREGARD my opinion, because I AM a citizen of the Philippines, I am a Filipino DEVOTED to truth.

I just hope that these ADMINISTRATION CONGRESSMEN AND ALL OTHER BLINDED CITIZENS OF THE REPUBLIC OF PHILIPPINES would realize what aftermath of all of these is. Are we to wait that the dollar hit a hundred and the oil price to fifty per liter? Or they might just realize it if these congressmen will juts experience to ride the jeepney and pay 7.50 for four petty kilometers. To sum it all up, maybe they’ll just realize that the Philippines is already poor enough for them to stop doing these crazy things if they too are poor! I hope we’ll not drop there, as early as now, please be enlightened so we don’t experience THESE CURSED THINGS.

Falsity is a curse. So is crisis…

Plain LUCKY...

2005-08-25T22:03:00.000-04:00

I took up a test a today for the second semester. ‘Twas great although, I thought it could be more difficult. In fact, I didn’t reviewed for it; how rude of me. I was applying for Nursing. Don’t howl on me, it’s not my choice and thank God, I’m not in Fatima (I have claustrophobia). Well, it’s my grandma’s choice and she promised that I can take up any course after that. It’s a consolation perhaps. I think, I’m gonna going easy in here, coz I just truly think that a life better than this is waiting for me. I mean, it’s not really my thing, so I better finish this so I can take up what’s really for me. Even though I WILL BE earning $50 an hour for this job, I’m not staying long for this, I will be pursuing for what I believe what I want.

Well, anyways, my grandma left me money for tuition; the problem: it’s dollars, I still have to have it changed for peso. So I rushed to SM to have this whole thing done. When I get to the bank, OMG, the line’s long and the cashiers were slow. And can you believe this, I spent three full painstaking tedious mind-numbing hours just to get my money changed. Believe me, my IQ lowers and my mind numbed because of exceeded boredom. And at last, I got PhP 22,360. How would I suppose to bring that awful lot when I’m living in a hold-upper infested country? Sure, I fear my life, but my mom would kill me if she learns I lost tens of thousands of pesos. And I fear my life. What did I do? I got an envelope and put that in the deepest of my bag. Outside the bank, no one knows I’m with money, so I can breathe better. But outside that mall, my heart started pounding. Pounding, in a way that my ribs break away and it goes out. I’m also hyperventilating, knowing that I might screw all things up anytime, anywhere. But, I’m too blessed for hold-uppers and snatchers. Nothing happened and nothing should happen! I’m too young to be massacred by my own mom for losing 22,000 bucks.

I paid the fee, got my reg form and blasted the way out of there!

I went to the mall, strolled and found myself lost in a big library. What I’m telling is Powerbooks – one of the greatest places that makes my life worth living. And hey, what a good timing – it’s a SALE day. I grabbed up Dan Brown’s DIGITAL FORTRESS. I’m eyeing for it a year ago and now I’m owning it. It had a 20% discount making it from 319 to 255 bucks. I was planning to buy it though in NBS for 349 but I’m too lucky for today! Three hours of enjoying, at least all my fave books truly makes up for this day’s stress. Need not a stresstab for it, just a treat of my fave book make my day great. Wait, my reward isn't finished yet; I ate to my heart’s content – a sizzling plate of spicy hot sisig topped with egg matching a thick luscious mushroom soup and two cups of hot and aromatic java rice. Too bad, I can’t afford my usual frappoccino from Starbucks or I’ll go broke.

Did I hear the king called me to his throne? Excuse me…

Under the slimy hands of the wicked reflexologist…

2005-08-22T01:53:00.000-04:00

Few days later I have back-aches and I suffered. Swear! I suffered severely!

AND I’M UNDER THE MERCY OF THE SLIMY-HANDED REFLEXOLOGIST…

I could not do but to scream ‘don’t kill me!’ and bear her hands going thru my back back and forth; each hand might weigh 10 tons each I think, coz it hurts when they get over you.
Every stroke means another minute of painstaking and inexorable deeply heavy massage from her icky hands. She’s… taking the pain away with another pain. And it really hurts. I couldn’t quite think how the pain goes away as her slogan says if her hands are that heavy! I can’t think of any other adjective that can complement her massage but hurting. A couple of hours of backbreaking massage… whew I’m grateful, my bones are still intact. I can smell the stench of menthol and eucalyptus in my skin. I feel like a koala is after me then. (Koalas eat EUCALYPTUS.)

Well, anyways, my backaches are gone, so I’m likewise thankful. (Gotta wash, a koala might eat me ya know!)

The Endless Waltz with Mrs. President... {on stepping her feet while dancing with her...)

2005-08-17T01:16:00.000-04:00

Notwithstanding my present condition, I still hear news. It doesn’t mean I get denied in a previous phase of my life that I won’t have time for my country. They got the wrong person.
Ever since the Gloriagate, I’ve been commenting on what is the government now. I just hope scumbag Bunye reads this blog. I will never stop even I lose out a penny renting internet, I will never ever stop criticizing them unless I see change.
Now that all cases were put into due process, why are there impeachment walls delaying the due process the president herself wants? Aren’t they too obvious; their actions manifest unconsciously that the president really is faulty. They are the one putting Mrs. President to her waterloo. Now, why are they called administration congressmen when they are the one plotting the president’s downfall – unconsciously.
The point is: why don’t they let due process go smooth, and start the restoration of the nation’s economic and political peace and unity? Can’t blame them – they ride luxurious cars everyday and have backup cars, eat more than three times a day and do have mini-palaces around the Metro – how can they feel the economic distress if they’re living a kingly life while others is TRYING to live, not knowing if they’ll eat tomorrow or never. That’s maybe why they keep on strangling the impeachment out of the congress, because they are not feeling a bit about economic distress.
Now, the oil’s starting to reach its highest price in the world market, what do they do. Sit around the plenary hall and watch men die out of hunger and poverty. Instead of ironing the impeachment and hurry it up to relieve the economy, they delay it. The president said once, that we take our grievances to congress and now it’s there, her congressional representatives built a wall against it. How will we ever solve this if they continue to do this and that and do nothing but go on circles?

We were going to nothing, I tell you…

On being a leader...

2005-08-15T04:15:00.000-04:00

Manic Monday. I smell work, work and work. And nothing but work. OA. I started the day with cooking lunch. I didn’t ate, I still have to bring my pesky brother’s project. I’m going to have it printed and I still have to give it to him. Now, isn’t he a menace. Instead of relishing myself in my couch, I’m here under the scorching sun riding a filthy jeepney, delivering his VERY important project. How will I ever be graduated with them? I mean, they have to have their life of their own; not depending on people every time. If they keep on relying on me, they might end up mouths to feed, and not would-be independent people of this world. I, being a youth, keep striving living a life, and they get in the way. I always dreamed that I live individually, having a real taste of how bitter life can be. Why don’t they?
All people are different. They are not an exception. But can they please stop bothering me; get a life!
Oh well, hush! I went to training this day. We danced a lil’ and talked a lot. We were summoned and we were subjected to discourse. Kuya Joel, one of the many institutions at KKB, talked all the while. He told us what to improve and what to lessen. But what I liked about his privilege speech was his own life story. He shared us what his life used to be. He told us what he was way back times gone by. He told us how immature he is; even now he is a leader. Frankly, I like speakers who don’t exempt themselves from mistakes and wrongdoings. They admit that they’re not perfect and they are committing mistakes. That is the ‘KUYA JOEL’ I heard this night. At first, I really don’t understand who he is, but now I’m beginning to see him in a brighter side. I thought, at first, he was an antisocial and highly dangerous, but now I see a very meek big brother that doesn’t deny that he still commits sin, that he’s still human.

Invading the Campus with DANCE

2005-08-13T04:14:00.000-04:00

Hey, this is it! Campus Invasion Conference… wooooooohooooooooo! It is really is it! The day I’ve been praying for… it’s here, happening right before my chinky eyes. My day starts with, of course, the continuation of our practice yesterday. Yeah, I’m still a deadbeat but I’m not offereing HIS MAJESTY the deadbeat but the best beat I have. We performed it and, whoo, it is done and we have danced quite well, unless from some mistakes. I’m very sad that I almost ruined the show; but to God be the glory, we finished it without tomatoes flying towards the stage, at least.
One moment I won’t forget about this event is the food. Yeah, I was talking to Denice, my co-dancer, and the food went plummeting to the ground. Being VERY used to what’s happening right before me, I picked it up and pretended nothing happened.
Though the day’s tiring it was fulfilling… CAMPUS INVASION: WINDS OF CHANGE, FULFILLING GOD’S PURPOSE!

PS: I told mom, I want a Sbarro Chicago Deep Pizza swimming in thick tempting white sauce. And all I got was two fried chicken (oh, I’m so FED up with chicken, I can cock-a-doodle-do!) and lots of mojos. And the heck, no softdrinks!

My feet hurts... again

2005-08-12T04:12:00.000-04:00

It’s our last practice for the Campus Invasion Conference, and I’m damn tired! We carried large speakers and amplifiers up to the Audio-Visual Room, a room which is four storeys up the ground. Imagine those huge thingies and that altitude. Before we started the practice we were already deadbeat, and we still had to practice, we have no choice. After hours of practice, we decided to cut it and continue tomorrow morning.

Apologies, I’m tired and my feet hurt.

Lost in Novaliches... somewhere out there!

2005-08-09T00:25:00.000-04:00

If it weren’t for my pesky brother, I wouldn’t waste my time being lost in an unfamiliar unhygienic city.
Faces I don’t know, the stench of carbon monoxides from cars which needs matches, and pirated CDs around the corner where there’s a ‘No Vendor’ signboard. A very violent environment, unfriendly jeepney drivers who don’t give student discount, and the worst cops who collect ‘kotong’ (bribe) from road-violating vehicles in return of immunity of road rules. Unless you’re a government official, you’re not exempted.
It all started when my pesky brother made my mom find help to work on his project ( I didn’t pass when I was high school then, since I’m excused from that subject) and he forgot to follow it up. And now he’s pressuring all of us to make a move to get that silly replica of a tower. I really hated that subject since elementary. Until now, I can feel the pain of receiving the lowest grade in the card that made your downfall in your academic career. Back again, I went to my mom’s office and fetch it.
I’m new to the place, but I still traversed well. The problem: It’s a race against short time. I have to get to school in about 10.30. It’s 9.45 and I’m still walking and wet. And, my God, it’s not easy; with all those turns and walks and slopes, it’s not easy especially if you’re new to a place. I’ve been in Manila particularly in Quezon City, where there lies my dream school University of the Philippines, and I’ve never been lost like this one. Not that I came to the point that I was totally dumbfounded on how big this impure city is; but I got lost in a polluted city, dripping wet and walking (my feet hurts) downtown. I hate it, especially when I’m walking while raining, deprived of an umbrella. I’ve been dripping wet before I got to school. Only to know that he got a whopping (talk about irony!) 78 percent for it. Wow! Great job! It sucks…
Oh well, the fact I came home un-amputated, that’s fine. It’s sometimes great being lost; you got to travel more and discover more about the place where you’re desperately lost. Even though you’re throbbing chest would kill you knowing the fact some robber can snatch your bag or a kidnapper snatch you, you can’t stop walking ‘cause you know you got a time to spare. It’s unsafe there, you know.

It still sucks and my feet still hurts…

Fulfilled!

2005-08-08T23:05:00.000-04:00

The one thing I prayed for so many times had come true.
That is, to minister even just before I, faithfully, leave the Philippines for study. And that will be coming to a fulfillment this upcoming Saturday. It will be the Campus Invasion Conference (CIC) and I will be ministering this time. If the previous CICs I’ve been just sitting around there TRYING to help, now’s my time to REALLY help! I’ve been finding the perfect time to minister. This year, being my most vacant year, will be my ministering year, I hope. This vacancy shall be used for God, so that I wouldn’t regret that I wouldn’t even moved a finger for the ministry. Then again, my only purpose is not for me but for God.
I really enjoyed this day. It is different, different from the other trainings we’ve done. We’re not in time under pressure, and pressure of spiritual confinement since we’ve refined ourselves earlier this Sunday. Surely, this one’s gonna turn out all right, because it is highly favored by the one true God!
Anyways, we did lots a talking about the steps, the dancers who will dance the dance (or shall we dance?) and of course, costume. We argued… if we’ll buy something 100 pesos and produce it two days from now or to buy pricier items from Ate Karen’s catalogue and have a month to pay it. And end up resorting to white shirts that will be repaired either by handprints or tie-dye. I should thank God for the idea He gave us. It would cost us lesser and would use a lil’ of our creative brain juices.
We will also be holding an online journal. People are hi-tech nowadays, and so are we. We would like to introduce Faithtrax.blogspot.com, Faith Trax’ very first online logbook/journal. We had a logbook then, but we want something new so we decided to have it there published in the net – inspiring, encouraging… and dancing. The webmaster, of course, no other than but yours truly, Jonver. This would be our official logbook. This would chronicle all our feelings, sentiments and stand on things regarding us. This would also be our official bulletin board and will be updated regularly for our activities and gigs.
Everything was moving so fast today, that also I have my side of the story. The chance of me having an immediate student visa is growing large and I thank God for that. We had help from the school I’m applying and would-be alma mater and from an immigration law office named Gurfinckle (doesn’t know if I write it right.) As I mentioned earlier, this Gurfinckle guys rarely lose their cases – they’re that renowned in terms of legal counsel and other law office activities.
Thanks to the one true God. To God be ALL the glory! Ciao!

Updates... coming soon...

2005-08-06T02:15:00.000-04:00

I am so sorry for not blogging these past few days... You know been busy about recovering and being happy just to forget what had happened... I just hope I can get through it just that quick...

And GLORIA... she's still in position... better get rid of her!!

I'll update... PROMISE!!

I Built My Castle in Sand

2005-08-05T02:08:00.000-04:00

Have you ever build a sand castle? I did not, not even once.

So… this is the feeling when you’re ‘castle’ is just built in sand. It will just be quickly destroyed by the sea, suddenly walked at by beach men and women, and the worst, when all efforts goes there, and no one notices it and be even dumped.

I built my dream in quicksand. And the US Embassy is the one who slaps it like a tidal wave in Aceh. I relied in my limited strength. I did not consider that there are other stronger, unlimited forces outside my strength. I disregarded God and his omnipotence. And there it goes, my dream being taken and washed away by the sea of failure. I feel the dream I built was of no value, all the efforts and all the hope and willpower I put was wasted. Because I didn’t rely fully on the Lord.

I don’t want to feel that the Lord has turned His back to me. I can still take every waver of this world but not His back. I think He became jealous of my strength. Instead of leaning to Him, I leaned to my own understanding. I want to say sorry to the Lord for my neglect, I know I have given Him the slightest attention that day. I admit that He doesn’t go top priority on that day. I declare my nothingness and helplessness to the Lord.

I don’t want to move a finger in the subsequent actions the Lord is planning. I might hinder God’s plans and will, for He is perfect, His decisions are beyond reasonable doubt. I have nothing; He has everything. So I might as well give it all to Him.

I am crying to the Lord that I am helpless. He is my only hope and refuge. I now rely on Him. On no other than. His undisputed actions are commendable and impeccable; so why doubt now I am on His arms and wings? His will is perfect and I have no doubt at it. I trust him now… fully and totally.

The Lord had answered my prayer just too fast. My grandmother called and she said that we may have another solution and that is to contact and seek advice to this one Gurfinckle guy. He’s an attorney-at-law in immigration, and he rarely loses a case (wow!) My grandmother will go home this August 10, Wednesday and will have all the time used up in this case. I thank the Lord for the immediate response. I’m still waiting for the Lord to act more intense. I am submitting to anything that He will do for I know He is perfect. I know; He will not fail me as He did not fail His children other than me.

I hope this continues… thanks be to the Lord!

Denial Epilogue: The Aftermath

2005-08-03T23:33:00.000-04:00

I’ve got the largest storm to hit myself today. The supposed-to-be greatest feat of my life turned to be my greatest slap of failure.

Undergoing to the hassles of VISA application, I just can’t believe they dumped me just because I’m too young. Well, it’s actually because I haven’t established “ties” that will coerce me to return here in the Philippines. But I’m telling you, I really am.

The moment, the interviewer said (she’s a she) that I’m too young, that I haven’t established strong “ties” that will compel me to return (didn’t I said that earlier?) “Ties”, for those who don’t know a thing about the embassy jargon, are things – social, familial, economic – that will make me return to my country of citizenship. Well, at first, I tried to defend my position and the only tie I had – my family, but I didn’t insist, they might ban me totally from entering the US. At first, I hyperventilated. I can feel that I’m running out of breath. I tried not to show the many people around my failure, they might be daunted and end up being just like me. Assessing my position in the embassy, of all the student visa applicants, it seems like that, I’m the only one going for college. The others that I followed are applying for Master’s Degree which is the afterlife of college degree. And their ages, they’re ages away from my age. The interviewer might be shocked that time seeing a wee lad in front of him. I freaked out, but not much.

I went to my ma and aunt. They are expecting that I will be approved. But I gestured my thumb down and said, Denied. A lil’ bit of envy to the master’s degree would-be holders bit me. What’s wrong with being young? Why, it IS the most typical age to study and why not give the opportunity. I just can’t comprehend what other ties do they need; can’t they see, I’m a minor and I can’t work nor that I can have a family of my own. The only possible tie for a minor is his own family. I have them – here in the Philippines and I have no intention to petition them there.

Honestly, I want to bomb the embassy. It may sound unchristian, but I really want. If you’re thinking a bomb, as in a real exploding bomb, no it isn’t. I just want to tell them how narrow-minded they are, how bias they are and how illogical they are. Life is. And I don’t expect them to be. Well, isn’t the American Dream a LIFE to crave for? Well, anyways, I want to tell the world how caring my ma was. She was so concerned in me that she called the people in NY and told them what exactly happened. They promised – they would do ANYTHING possible way to reconsider my efforts. Still, as human nature, to see is to believe.

You can’t blame me if I would feel shame and dismay, it’s human nature. No one can tell me enough that it is okay and that I have still too many years to guzzle. No one can comfort me… no one but God.

I just thought, ALL things work together for the good of those who love Him. He would never discourage me, but the devil is. Spiritual it may be, God never harms His people, but He sometimes allow the devil to hurt us a lil’ to test us. He wants us to despair in our strength and have no other option but to throw away ourselves to His endless grace (paraphrased from Josh Harris’ Not Even A Hint.) Our strength and wisdom might be limited but God is omnipotent/scient. He is endless, He is eternal. His mercy lives forever. God made me realize that he is just preparing me more for the new life I would be facing. My ma told me, that I have to let go of any bitterness, especially in the family, that is, my father and brother Kevin. That would be the hardest thing to do for me. It’s not that easy to forgive someone who doesn’t apologize! Nevertheless, I’ll try. God wants me to forgive them and improve my relationship with them – from ma, pa Kevin to Angel. Another thing is, God might want me to serve Him while I’m still here in the Philippines.

Of all that things, I still cannot hold on to something solid but the will of God. I still believe that the American Dream is still mine. God’s still willing to give me that. It’s just that, it’s not the perfect timing. This time, I don’t want to interfere with God’s movement. I have done my part, maybe it’s hi-time for me to pass the burden to God and His part. I think He wants me to trust Him FULLY and TOTALLY lean not on my own understanding, and let Him do the job. I will just let go of that if and only if the Lord would not show any more ways to redeem myself. This time, I’ll submit to him; I rarely do that. God, it’s all yours!

It can be traumatizing. It can be disappointing. It can be a shame. But the only thing I looked up to now is – God. He’s the one who will work for me this time. It’s a time to nurture my faith – believe and trust God with all of your heart, soul, and mind. I can do nothing; He can do everything.

The greater the failure is, the sweeter the success.

The Denial Part1

2005-08-03T04:49:00.000-04:00

The feat is over... and I've been denied...

I don't know... siguro meron akong malaking pagkukulang... (Maybe I have a very big shortcoming...)

But I do know God has a plan, so I won't fret, God will make a way.

My day started just as right as I could thought of it. I woke up, with just three hours of sleep and a lil' piece of bread. The day had just started, still, there's no hassle.

My appointment at the US Embassy would start at 7.20 AM. I am required to arrive an hour before my appointment, hence, 6.20 AM. And the day has just been begun.

Oh alright, I have to xerox some copies for backup. Sorry, I forgot, hey I'm just being human. I arrived the embassy right down the very last minute. The first lane I lined into is quite long. I've met a couple of older ages than me and we began tattling. Just right, the line's going just right. That what was the first line was for -- For detecting and searching for "invalid" objects like cellphones, deadly weapons and recorders. I was pushed onto the next line.

This one's slow. I have to have an Appointment Number for the interview, so I have to get one here. I was with people in the line. The ones after me are professors from different universities. They talked and talked about their before-lives in the US being a newbie teacher. They share their experiences as an ALIEN in the US. Sorry, can't help overhearing. Unfortunate me, I still have to fill-up another form to supplement my application. That slows me down. After which, I proceeded to the nect window. Wow, a hot chick. the attendant in that window is a slim, pretty chick that caught my eye. Unluckily, I'm not there to see her but the consulate.

So much for sidetrips, I had to undergo pre-screening befor I proceed to the actual interview. A white woman entertained me, and for ther first time, I heard an american speak Tagalog. Wow, quite rare! Anyways, she was as hospitable as Filipinos are, which is good. I think she maybe here a long time ago, that she learns our language.

Another line (duh, expect many people applying for a US Visa!) and this one's super boring! The second to the last line (ooooh... I'm close!) is the finger mark detector. There very secure at that place, they really is... I got my finger mark scanned and voila, they seem to have a bit of info 'bout me... Guess I can't hide from them.The last line I'm in is the interview per se. My gate (rather a booth!) is number 3. I've seen many student visa applicants there and it seem like the interviewer of the stud visas. I waited and waited and waited. It seems like there are more student visa applicants as I see... It's been an hour and...

[Look after my side of the story at the epilogue...!]

Countdown to JUDGMENT

2005-07-27T03:42:00.000-04:00

I will be not be available to blog for the next FEW (just few...) days, just because...

I will be preparing for my US Embassy Interview
I will be beauty-resting. Of course, I have to look good on that day. (Aug.3.2005)
I shall not spend my time in unnecessary and nonsense things, I have to meditate and achieve ultimate clearness of the mind. I have to condition myself well.
I will be refraining from hearing the news as it contributes to my depression and frustration.
I will be avoiding talking about Gloria, the Embassy might suppose I am an activist, while the truth is I just love my nation.
I will be praying for absolute guidance and smoothness of my interview

I just hope it goes well and smooth. I don't want to put all my efforts in vain...

I went to several agencies just to ask advice for VISA application
I paid a lot of money for my passport, birth certificate, affidavits and other requirements.
I recopied my latest passport picture for several documents I will need.
I went to Pampanga and suffered a long line just to get a Travel Clearance and pay 300 damn bucks just for that small blue piece of paper.

And I have no plans to disregard what endeavors I have done to reach this stage in VISA Application. I pray to the Lord that He guide me to a smooth interview with the consul general at the US embassy.

This is a matter where FAILURE is not an option...

The non-stop Gloriagate blogs...

2005-07-26T01:57:00.000-04:00

Sorry for irritating you in blogging nothing but GLORIA MACAPAGAL ARROYO... I am so sorry for I have contributed to the massive force of worldwide boredom...

If she bores you, so do I.

Hope she resigns. So I could blog more interesting details... and not her!

Grand Late Entrance

2005-07-25T22:36:00.000-04:00

Ah, today’s one of those students are longing for… no classes. At vacation, they asks for school and now they’re given school, they long for a vacation. Weird!
The real deal is, today, the pseudo president will be stating the condition of her fake state. What do we expect from a fake president? Of course, a fake government and fake speech. All lies! She uses the government not for good governance of what is supposed to be her masters but for defending her position from those “power-grabbers.” I don’t think so that she is doing her job, despite what the media tells the people. Hey, are the media men also bribed that they no longer provide good and true news? I just hope they just correspond to what the presidential spokesman is relaying about the president. Because the reality is, she is just ignoring the real condition of the nation; there is no real condition of the nation for no one is REAL-ly governing!

One thing I see in her performance today is; she is competing with the anger of the indignant demonstrating mass outside the Batasan Pambansa. The people, as said in the news, assembled early five in the morning. The much-awaited speech (resignation, I just hoped) of PGMA is announced 2.00. While waiting in home, it was half past two, and there was not a single sound wave from her. It is three in the afternoon, where it is surely hot in the roads, and I was hallucinating if GMA was given the JFK treatment – assassination, since there was no woman right before that podium in the plenary. It was three thirty when the news teams announced, that the soon-to-be-damned bitch would be talking after another hot thirty minutes. I just guess how she watches the demonstrators while giggling seeing them have skin cancer. She showed up and the rest is history.
She made the whole nation in complete stop to wait for her grand late entrance. To there speak for 23 minutes, periodically extending the speech because of unnecessary applause and standing ovation (33 to count), and finished it just quickly to spend more yap with her allies and to hypocritically shake the hands of her political nemeses.
She just mentioned we’re divided, period. Then she focuses her audience to her accomplishments and charter change. She forgot to highlight what is the latest in her platinum record – Hello Garci? She disregarded the high unemployment and underemployment rate in the land. With her scumbag advisers, she even ignored the just-passed impeachment complaint against her. She also ignored (she can’t be innocent) the rallying mass just to kick her out that palace beside the stinky (as she were) Pasig River. Well, I just believe, if she vacates her position, the river might somehow give off a sweet smell. If…
She just said that she would not waver at any political cost. She just said that she is “ruling” two Philippines – one that is on the verge of take off and the other stuck in political crises. She is the top politician of this nation, and whenever there is a political crisis, the one’s blamed is the president. I bet, she is turning down unconsciously. She just hinted that politicians, with other interest than to serve the country, should not run the country as they (including the one with the initials GMA) deter the take-off of the nation.
She just tattled things that the people back in the 70’s hated about. She forwarded the debate for charter change and federalism. And I don’t think that the people are much pleased. She didn’t even speak in her native tongue. She addressed it, invisibly, to the middle-class sector of the Philippines – the ones who eat three meals a day, have a home to go to and a stable income; while she forgot the urban and rural poor, which much needed her efforts. She is there not to state the real condition of the nation, but to impress and prevent vacating her position as the “big boss” of the land. She is not governing, but she in now on a mission to defend her rank.

I despise her. For she doesn’t see what her ignorance has contributed, the nation is at stake. She is the supreme delay to what the Philippines must be now. She hinders every single development, all because of her unrighteous ruling. Why does she have to be so vague? She admitted it already, why doesn’t she just atone for what she has done – resign! Admit that she really didn’t won and that she talked to Garcillano and that she cheated the elections. Everybody knows that she is the voice in that CDs scattered all around – the marketplace, schools and the internet. People supporting Gloria might not be experiencing the economic downfall – they don’t have money then, they don’t have money now – then what’s the difference?
If just everyone will feel what great tragedy, in terms of economy, had this event contributed to our discouraged nation, then maybe, the great change may ONLY occur.

Sniff and Blow Days

2005-07-23T00:23:00.000-04:00

Fridays, as many refer to, is a happy day. It’s time for an endless night in front of the TV, a disco-night, mall day, etc. But this day for me is very… sickening, literally. I have colds and I seem not to… A-ACHOO… cope with it. I kept sniffing, sneezing, and blowing. I just managed it just this hour, when I took medicine. I didn’t take the medicine early this morning because it will only cause me to doze off. And that means, I won’t be able to read Twisted, watch TV, and cook food. I don’t want to spend the whole day bedridden, that would make me more sick.
Anyways, don’t you just hate ruining a day just because of just colds? My, I just hate this day because, I haven’t to do but just to sniff and blow. Sniff and blow, sniff and blow, sniff and blow, sniff and blow, sniff and blow. And didn’t I tell you sniff and blow. Having colds is like destroying a beautiful Friday night. Instead you’re with your friends having a drink, a good ol’ place to read or even to watch a TV show properly. No! You’re with the hanky and you sniff and blow. Yeah sure, I did read and watch the TV but, I blow my nose every two minutes. Imagine that, missing the only sensible scene in the show you’re watching just because you have to blow, lest, you choke out of air.
A cool Friday night is really cool today. It is chilly, with my running (runny) nose, I can’t sleep. Now, I have to blow every minute. How can I sleep with such a nose that crazy? Ah! I can’t take this anymore. I have to sleep. I’m sleepy and irritated. I can’t stand it anymore. Just a cat nap – I just have to sleep. Please, my nose, hear me! Or else, I have to blow a hard blow – you’ll go numb!
Speaking to your nose can help. But crazy.

Dreaded OC

2005-07-21T22:33:00.000-04:00

OC has attacked me today as it never attacked me before.
Yes, and it almost killed me. The attack was fatal. I have this strange urge to be irritated at anyone, anything, and anywhere! And I can’t even help it. OC, or obsessive-compulsive people get the tendency to do things they’re somewhat obsessed or something unexplainable. People like ME often list and abide by it. Listed things, when broken, freak them out.
I am an OC boy.
I hate disorganized things (even though I am a disorganized boy trying to be organized, it’s just that it makes me feel better). I list everything – to-dos, collection inventories, brands of shirts and pants that I have, a Christmas getaway in the middle of September, a spectacular summer vacation in just the start of classes. I often value the tiniest details but I missed the essential ones. Sometimes, I settle for the best I knew, but it really is the worst. I hate missing my faves – shows, food, collection, books, etc. I love collecting though my budget doesn’t really suits it. I ended up tightening my budget. If I had listed things to do, it’s a no-no to break it, lest, I end up with a bad hair day. And the worst, I often flare up with anything with an unreasonable rationale – ‘I don’t know.’ If and if I can’t sleep or can’t do anything right, I will do anything unusual like rolling about the bed, pulling out several strands of hair ‘til I feel I’d lose them, or cleaning my room with no other reason but – ‘I don’t know.’ The basis of everything I do is what I want. I never settle for the things I despise. I freak out almost everyday – like it’s my life. Normal days are boring days; extraordinary (extraterrestrial) days spells adventure.
Weird is the often description of people like me. Laymen tend to misunderstand us, and call us freaks and klutzes or sometimes people who are not really people (aliens perhaps) They just don’t know what we really are…
Now, today’s attack of the OC is really fatal. I can’t seem to get a hold of myself (not that I had cerebral palsy or something!) All day, I suffered being irritated by everything – the damn hot weather (I must’ve watched that weather channel), the mosquitoes biting (where is the repellent and the spray when you need them), the open doors, the gloomy light, my slimy glasses (should’ve replaced it), the book I can’t finish, the ants crawling into my groin part (I wonder, is it tutti-frutti scented inside there), the dumb, boring TV shows, the slouching couch, the loud music in your father’s lair, the dust everywhere, the food, the cat crawling in the dining table, the dog howling, the clothes in the clothesline… everything!
I am irritated today. Nuisance spells this day right. I am not in pain; I was pain! If this day continues forever, I’d lose my sanity and if I lose it, the world’s in grave danger of my rants. My gattling-gun-like mouth would breathe the fire of outrage and total annoyance. I would devastate all relaxing people, all siesta-loving people. I would provide daily bad hair day. I would make everyone feel how an OC feel, how I feel!
(Oh shoot! Where’s that disc I have to ‘burn’? I’m starting again.)
The fact I can write here is the only proof the attack has mellowed. The weather seems nice, the food tastes better and the clothes are spared from being burned. And I, at last, calmed down a lil’.
I hope I’m can still be rational if an attack again occurs…

Stateside: Mga Kwentong NY

2005-07-21T01:23:00.000-04:00

At last, I have so much of those dull, devastated days I have lately. I have now something to do, at least! Even though I ended up panting and hungry, I liked this day as any other exciting days I had. I danced… again! Dancing is one of my hobbies but I stopped recently (if one year is recent for you, that is…) because of extreme busy-ness. The school, my grades, the school paper, the yearbook/s, and most of all, my family. I have spent most of my time, just for a while (one year?), just to attend to my family. And now, they’re off to their respective school-and-work chores, I am now ultimately free to do whatsoever I like. If I want to leave the house, I can. If I want to attend a dance training session, I can. I am now free; no one can hinder me, whatever I want to do. It’s because… I’ll be off to New York in two months time. It is the reason I see they allow me to have this some sort of FREEDOM. Although, it is really boring here in the house, I need to go out and get a life!
I’ll surely miss my life here in the Philippines. Nothing beats the Philippines.
I just watched Pinoy Abroad. They highlighted Los Angeles, USA – the city and the life! It is titled Stateside: Mga Kwentong LA (Stories from LA). I had realized my would-be life in NY, since in two months; I’ll be living a different and absolutely new life. I’ll be starting from scratch, just like any other stranger in any block.
I’ll start with my trip.

I’ll probably leave the house 1.00 in the morning and have 3 hours more left to prepare for departure. I’ll be metally censored. My bags will be having their first X-ray. And myself being touched by almost malicious guards to determine if I don’t have bombs in my bod (hoped they don’t touch ANYthing!). Then, my grandma and I would wait in the lobby at least for an hour… and the plane would arrive NAIA. We would walk calmly unto the plane and would be relaxed at our seats, probably with each other as seatmates. A steward would come up and demonstrate how would we react if an aerial strife would happen. I, having this only my second chance to ride a plane, would pay full attention at how he/she does it before I die out of anxiety. The plane takes off and I would tell my grandma how I reacted on my first flight at Cebu. She would be somehow irritated and would prefer to sleep due to fatigue. I would grab a TWISTED book from my hand-carried bag and read it as silently as I could (if I could restrain myself from laughing, that is.) Then, hours after, we would stop at Nagoya, Japan. The airline would refill fuel. I, being a devoted animé lover, would freak out at all these Japanese stuff I only see at specialty stores in the Philippines. I would have fun and my grandma will have the nicest rest she just had in our trip – without my nasty presence! I would run to my grandma and tell her, I’m finished running about like a child. We would go in the plane and take off again.
Breakfast served! I would prefer a French toast with a Mocha coffee and a newspaper. ‘Mommy’ (that’s what I call her, I call my mom ‘MAMA’. Tired of typing grandma…^_^) would have a black coffee with matching creamer and a sunny side-up. We would share in the paper. (That’s if we are to choose our breakfast.) I read the paper and would see – PGMA ousted by impeachment trial. (Wow, I’m real positive. Even PGMA’s ousted in my dream itinerary.) I had so much joy just in reading PGMA’s ousting, that I disregarded that we’d been a day in the plane – wow, a mobile hotel. I grabbed a pen and paper and wrote what just happened 24 hours ago. The plane we rode had TVs in every seat. I accessed mine and I turned to GMA Pinoy TV (Oh, I just hope!) Being an innate couch potato, I could survive five full hours of televiewing. I will eventually get bored and decided, at long last, to sleep. Having the minimum of two hours, I will be awakened by Mommy to pack-up; it’s Detroit, USA, our second and last stop. Having my first taste of the Americas, this city would give me my first impression of what Americans are like. Though I can’t really conclude because this IS Detroit and I would be going to NY, so, I can’t really say what I would feel in NY. After an hour we will be boarding again the plane and would be heading to NY, just will be miles away from Detroit. I would grab my unfinished TWISTED book and put it to an end.
Hours after, we’re in NY Airport. We would check out our bags, have a cab and go to 35-C Picotte Drive, Albany, NY; our apartment-residence. I would be dealing with first my baggage. I would be so hungry, I would find food. Unfortunately, there’s no cooked food, I would feast at the spams and sausages and wheat breads. Jeez, I would be double my size if I continue this kind of diet! Anyways, I’ll enjoy the feast. I’ll make some fresh fruit juice and have a session with the king at the bathroom. Unfortunate me, I don’t have my laptop, so I would at least be happy with my notebook as my temporary diary. I would watch some TV shows and would have my forty winks and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz… tomorrow comes… huh? Oh! I’m… here… in the Philippines… jeez…

Daydreaming isn’t bad, just don’t overdose it.

Yung dagdag, Yung dagadad

2005-07-17T23:36:00.000-04:00

Conversation between Gary (V. Garcillano) and an unidentified female believed to be GMA (Pres. Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo) on 31 23:17 hotel May 2004
Garcillano: Hello, ma’am.
GMA: Hello, tsaka ano yung kabila, they’re trying to get the Namfrel copies of the Municipal COCs.
Garcillano: Namfrel copies ho?
GMA: Uhm-um.
Garcillano: Ay wala naman, ok naman ang Namfrel sa atin. They are now sympathetic to us.
GMA (mumbling): Oo, oo … (garbled) …Namfrel does not tally. Pero yun nga, yung dagdag, yung dagdag.
Garcillano: Oho, we will get an advance copy ho natin kung anong hong kwan nila.
GMA: Oo, oo.
Garcillano: Sige po.

How numb that woman is!

2005-07-17T22:36:00.000-04:00

Is GMA reel or real? Why does she keep on being numb on what’s been happening on our nation.
We always hear it on the news, GMA’s working fine today, she’s off to meet some so-called supporters, she’s with her family on the Manila Bay, she’s to pass an economic reform…blah, blah, blah. I’m fed up with hearing the news. Only to know that she’s not resigning and declaring that she is a numb witch (bitch??) Now who would want a president such as that? She ignores the most important part of this government, her boss, the Filipinos. And I’m not watching the news until they she some difference…!
Now, she’s starting to speak, what do we hear from her – I am not resigning. I won fair and square. Yup, her face is square but she isn’t fair, she just let the fare hike (connection?) How fair? To the point of cheating the elections? Yung dagdag, Yung dagdag…the successor of the Hello Garci controversy. She said -- …take your grievances to congress. And what? Wait until the dollar exchange to peso turns 70, 80 or 100? We can remember that fateful impeachment trial of Erap and still she favors it despite its economic risks? The dollar exchange that time is 60 and with her case much heavier than Erap’s no doubt, the peso will no longer have value in the market. She can risk it while seeing more families suffer in hunger and poverty? How numb…! How numb is this woman who still wants to stay in position. She knew verily that she is now incapable to govern the nation. She knew verily that she has betrayed our trust. And therefore, resign from position.
You, how numb are you? What? Perhaps another people power? Or maybe an assassination plot of the our so-called president? Neither! We need prayer power! We need to pray for our nation. We need to intercede for it.
Now, if we can’t do anything surely God can do everything. And GMA is not an exemption to the rule!

Difference

2005-07-15T01:05:00.000-04:00

Oh well, today’s another of those boring days that I hate. Why do I have to suffer being bored to death by almost everyday. Can’t I even have a very exciting, or a very adventure-y week? Jeez, destiny’s really cruel. Normal days, BAH! I hate them! Get away from me, normal days!
I am not even normal. So why I have to suffer being normal and be punished with boredom anyway? I want abnormal days. Be an AB Normal student (get it, AB Normal…). That’s my way of life. Being normal really sucks.
When you’re different, you get to experience extraordinary (extraterrestrial) incidents. When you’re different you are deprived of attention. Not the attention we need but the annoying attention of unimportant people around you. Since you are different, normal people have the tendency to get away from you dubbing you a freak, weird. And most of all, when you’re different, most of the time, you get the most of life, the one no one but you have. The one, you can say, it is only I! It is only I who has this way of life. “Only I know this path.” Thus, giving you the ultimate freedom to do what you exactly want. Difference is freedom.
Normality means mediocrity. And mediocrity is inferiority. Who wants to be inferior? Everybody’s trying hard to be superior and the only key to that is difference from others.
In politics, why does history, almost all the time, only repeat itself? It is because NO different politician is elected. The same wrongs are done again. It looks like we just voted the same corrupt official or the same sweet-tongued TRA-PO (traditional politician) because the one we voted is the mediocre type of person. We ignore the “different” idealistic people running for position. Why? Is that because they’re of no popularity or because they will ruin your criminal plans. We just overlook the people who are actually the destined superiors and make them the superior inferior. POPULARITY is not a valid credential for a politician!
The fashion world is ruled by “different” people. Art is, anyway, different in any angle! The ones who excel in vogue are those who are innovative, creative, and idealistic humans. Anyone whose a la mode surely has a different perspective of life. They are the exact examples of people who I deem different. These types of people who have the everlasting ideas, the never-ending perspective about anything, the people the world must be filled of.
Being different is not to be weird. It is your choice to be different and be weird, though. But the difference I am talking about is the way we see life. Yup, life is short, better live it to the fullest. Do not take drugs or any vices, though. IT IS NOT THE FULLEST!
Difference to the normal boring life. Boredom to death is a crime!
Difference to the paradigm of the mediocrity in the society. Mediocrity is being damned for eternity.
Difference to the same way corrupt officials’ minds. Corruption of the mind is a mortal sin!
Difference to the world. The world is sin, and if we choose to be different from it, we choose the other way around.

Sum up all the thought above, then you get… M–E, ME!

The Itinerary to Rebuild the Nation

2005-07-13T00:49:00.000-04:00

Just gotten home from the rally. I’m actually tired but I’m longing for more. The rally’s up to tomorrow morning but our group decided to go home since we have students with us. They cannot be excused from their classes so we have to send them home or else we might suffer the litany of their mothers. But here’s our itinerary to rebuild the nation:

ü I started the day, well, with my household chores. As the cliché goes, to change a nation is to start from within. I drew the clothes from the clothesline. Then, I refilled the water station and iron my clothes for today. It’s a quite harder day to do it as I’m in a rush. The rendezvous at JILCF is 11.00 while I woke up 9.15. So, you see, I have to pressure myself a lil’ more than any other days.

ü My dad offered me money this day. Jeez, am I lucky or what. I got a whopping 300 pesos! I, at least, had the reward I deserve for the chores. But I didn’t do it on purpose, ya know? HONEST!

ü I arrived at JILCF 11.30. I’m double thinking if they’re still there, since the assembly time is 11.00, they might have gone without me! I’m already thinking of riding the MRT to Ayala and walk my way to Paseo de Roxas. Nonetheless, I’m wrong. They’re still there. And the orientation isn’t over. Oh, shoot, FILIPINO time. I thought change starts from within. Well, anyways, Ptr. Bobot orient us what we will do once we’re there. After a worship song and some more prayers, we took off at Bus #3.

ü Whew, it’s sure is noisy when you’re with the students. They’re so noisy I can’t help to say, Psssst!. In the bus, I have Ate Jen from the TEATRO ministry. I chose her to be my companion all throughout the rally because she’s hilarious and energetic. We did have a good time with each other, throwing joke to one another. Another co-joker is MG also from TEATRO. She’s the main attraction, though. She’s (MG) fat, I mean chubby, and a bit hungry; that’s why we kept hiding the food!

ü We arrived MRT Ayala Station but we will be dripping wet when we continued. It began to pour out and we have no other choice but to stop for a while. Being an inborn joker, I presented them some of my comical impromptu hoaxes. The jokes I gave them seemed to shorten the actual long time we stayed at the station. Some ate, some sat, and some… laughed!

ü And at last the fun began; we began walking to SM Makati. That’s the national rendezvous. We realized that we’re already late so we just resumed the march to the nation’s rebuilding. Then Paseo de Roxas. At first, there are the teachers from JILCF. Then we began seeing the crowd to grow. The Student Government, the JILian Press (The Visionaries), and the KKBs are among the youth in the area. We are summoned at the back to prepare for a grand barrage. Kuya Roan, head of KKB-UP, made the cheers and relayed it unto us. The cheers and chants are Pagbabago, Bro. Eddie, Sama na, Sama na, sa PAGBABAGO, and Diyos at Bayan.

ü And yes, we barricaded the whole Paseo de Roxas. We barraged in, chanted and shout our ways to heaven. We weren’t shouting to Gloria but to the Heaven above. We believe that God is smiling at us that time. We shouted our lungs out, waved the yellow and green flags, with the desire to rebuild the nation.

ü Bro. Eddie spoke and the crowd again flared in the rally. Shouts from the different parts of Paseo de Roxas can be heard. And of course, the voice of youth is vox dei! For we are the hope of this country!

ü Different people from the different sectors of the nation began to show up. The congressmen who don’t even gave a damn about our other rallies are now speaking their heart in the stage. Etta Rosales is a crowd fave. Joel Villanueva is a regular. But the Pateros congressmen (I forgot his name!) is absolutely new!

ü This is a prayer rally. We gather here to pray not to wreak havoc. A rally of prayers for the nation is sober, rather of mixed emotions. We jointly begged the Father in Heaven to “heal our land” and to unite us once again.

ü A special number from the myriad of talented members of the church performed for the glory of God. Some sang the English and Tagalog version of When You Believe and the other I remembered is the Tagalog song I don’t know the title.

ü And a victory proclamation is a usual for the JIL church. It’s a way of saying WE HAVE WON! To the tune of the hip but godly songs we like One Way, King of Majesty, and O Hesus Dakila Ka!. We danced and sang, praised the Almighty as we visualize how happy He is for His people are now united in front of Him.

ü Awww… it’s sad but we have to go. But it’s only 8.00 PM and the programme have actually only just begun. It’s because of those pesky (sorry for the word but they really are!) students. However, I dazed the evening while having a tête-à-tête with Ate Jen. We talked about her life, my life, college life, spirituality, liberty, the transformation of the government and why do we have to go in such an early hour! Well, she get off at the crossing at Bocaue. She resides in Guiguinto which is past Bocaue. While I traversed the dark road to home. At home I devoured the fodder at the dining table, switching turns with a drink. I thought, I didn’t ate lunch and I’m too late for dinner, such a jinx, but hey, we got a nation change so what’s a jinx?

The road might be swishing we can’t do it. The weather may oppose. The media can be unfriendly. But… we still don’t care. We only care about our beloved nation that will e no longer in the yoke of slavery of sin. We are redeemed, we are saved and thus, the change begins. We managed to start the flame within and we don’t mind igniting every once in a while. For we are the chosen people, for we are citizens and for we are the children of God; we won’t give the devil a chance to sneak past us. Our eyes wide open, our ears listening to his footsteps, our senses awake, our spirit strong; he is no more welcome to this land. We expel the devil in our nation along with his false piety. Then God reigns. FOR THE PHILIPPINES IS FOR GOD!

Now, I shall sleep. I need rest for the battles ahead. I need to recharge myself in order to keep in touch in what will happen in the next days to our nation. BANGON PILIPINAS!

The Nation at Turmoil

2005-07-12T01:15:00.000-04:00

The nation at turmoil, behold, the power of God shall manifest right before your eyes. GLORIA REPENT!

A while ago, I was just memorizing what I will shout tomorrow, er… for the next 13 hours. Wait, I haven’t said you, have I? I shall join ANOTHER prayer rally later; I just stole a moment to jot, that’s all. But now, we’re going to the roads of Makati, Paseo de Roxas for exact. If we confined ourselves in the power of God at Folk Arts, now we will show how much we love the country. We shall show the world how God will move in this place, in this country. Again, we’ll not pose a threat, perhaps a coup de etat or massive leave for Gloria to resign. Of course, as Christians, we will promote peace and anti-violence, but we will not allow Gloria’s unlawful governance to continue.
Forgive me, but I’ll paraphrase widowed actress Ms. Susan Roces – Liars and thieves are brothers. If Gloria’s a liar, then she’s a thief; and if she’s a thief, she’s a criminal, and if she’s a criminal, SHE HAS NO RIGHT TO GOVERN THE PHILIPPINES! How can we possibly permit a robber, a burglar ruling this nation? Yes, she is a burglar, a burglar of votes. Votes that are suppose to equalize the stature of the people – from the elite group to the hungry group. She simply stole the rights of the people, her masters. She rules the country, but she is a public servant, and we are her masters! Don’t you realize that whenever government officials win, they look up to themselves as boss, where in reality they are public servants? The government belongs to the people who gave them the trust to lead. Well, they’ve betrayed us and sorry isn’t just enough! PUBLIC APOLOGY is just a part, wherein punishment is the other part. So she said sorry, then where is the other part?
Are we to ignore the country’s instability as our president does? Are we to sit only despite the fact we’re being fooled by the name of Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo? What are we to do? We should pray with faith. We should kneel down and ask forgiveness for our sins. We should intercede for our beloved nation. We should pose a stand against the true enemies of the nation – Gloria and her schemes. Who should care for the nation? Other people? Are we not responsible for what will happen to the Philippines? Filipinos, men and women of the Philippines, children of God, let us unite and pray for the nation with faith and trust in the Lord. Only God can move a nation. No one but God!
I am saying these not to interrupt your classes and other work. I am not encouraging you to go with us if you’re fully loaded. Hence, if your free, then go. But, if you really can’t fix up your sched then don’t go. This is not the only time and place to pray… don’t let your other works suffer. You can just give it a time, pray for our beloved Philippines… and pass this message. Since, prayer is our objective; you can also partake even while in your homes. The Lord shall understand that you are just trying to balance your life and there’s still tomorrow. But please, don’t forget to do your part. Remember Nehemiah, he said while rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem, you will have no portion, no right and no memorial in Jerusalem, to those who didn’t do their part. Same as Nehemiah, I dare you, that if you don’t do your part, YOU SHALL HAVE NO PORTION, NO RIGHT AND NO MEMORIAL IN THE PHILIPPINES.

Please excuse me, I have some rally to attend…

"That's MY PREROGATIVE"

2005-07-09T07:20:00.000-04:00

My Prerogative
Inspired by the song My Prerogative as sung by Britney Spears

People around me think. . .
Think of me and my so-called PREROGATIVE

I am out of this world
An outcast or maybe just an antisocial
I don’t know. . .
I have “friends” but I have only one true friend
I have people I “love” but only few I truly love

Am I crazy?
Out of my mind?
Weird?
Or just plain…
LOST

Earth is not my home
Maybe Mars or perhaps Pluto
Or am I just weird

If being weird is one’s prerogative
I choose to be one
If that’s what it takes
To show my true me
To show them who really I am
And to finally…
Meet my TRUE friends

I just want to be me
Me and me and me
Am not selfish
But just want to be
ME

BRITNEYpoetry

2005-07-09T07:16:00.000-04:00

“Why Don’t You Do Something!”

People judge people
So people are judged because they judged

What’s wrong?
I like her…
I like her music…
It’s just fandom

Why do people kept on judging me
“Why don’t they just let me LIVE”
“Sometimes…”
“I’m a slave…”
… of the criticisms of everyone…
Can’t I give them…
an “Autumn Goodbye”?

I just can’t “Anticipate…”
What’s gonna happen next…
I just know
I want her “…one more time”

Because of her, I know
“Everytime…”
I know there’s someone...
“Against the music”
Who’s oh-so-“Lucky”
And oh-so-“Toxic”

She “Drives me crazy…”
“I’ll never stop loving…” her
“From the bottom of my broken heart…”

After all the criticisms
All I can ask is
“Why don’t you do something?”
All I can say is
What’s wrong with being a Britney Fan?

Hello Garci? Repent tayo!!

2005-07-02T00:08:00.000-04:00

I just came home from the Tanghalang Francisco Balagtas formerly Folk Arts Theatre. I am sleepy. But I won’t sleep at you, promise…!
I went there, for one reason. To praise and to pray to the only God I know. ‘Let God be God!’ is indeed a historical event in which the Body of Christ is restored, united, and worshipping the Lord in one voice. We are really history-makers of our own time. At the confab rather a rally, I fancied upon a song that kept striking me wherever I go. Surely it’s not one of those LSS or Last Song Syndrome, but it really kept pinching my inner self. The song goes…

Give us clean hands
Give us a pure heart
Let us not lift our souls
On another

Oh God, let us be
A generation that seeks
Who seeks your face
Oh, God of Jacob

Actually, the song asks for cleansing. Clean hands and a pure heart. These two things we need to continually change something. The change that starts from within.
But why? What’s the cause? Why are we here, surrendering our neat beds to this hot, humid place? It is because we are now starting rebuilding the nation, the Philippines.
The Gloriagate CDs are on the loose. The nation is under turmoil. This is our cause, the love for our beloved nation. Once, I pictured out that there might be polices and marines guarding the theatre that anytime might caught us inciting to sedition. Well, God’s a good God. He never let his people suffer from injustices like this. We are at once given freedom to speak, to pray, to praise and worship, to express our deep feelings about the nation.
The nation is at the peak of transformation. And also at the peak of revolutionizing the one seat at Malacañan Palace and change forever its image. We don’t need a corrupt president. We don’t need a president that cheats. We don’t need a president that hides. We don’t need a president that doesn’t love us even once. We don’t need you, Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo. Maybe, you’re asking what or where is your proof that PGMA cheated the previous elections. Various parts of the society kept singing of what had happened during May 2004 Elections – teachers, politicians, or even the bribed. Now tell me, who doesn’t know that voice on the Gloriagate CDs? Even the rats can tell, that’s GMA’s voice. She raped the Philippines, along with her cronies, co-saboteurs, her fiends, or even the innocent that’s hiding her mistake. They have no portion in what to become of the Philippines – the America of Asia.

As for the program-watchers, the rally started with the singing of the national anthem. Then by the Worship Leading Team, the praise and worship. After which, Bro. Eddie Villanueva shared a short exhortation on what will be the become of those who oppose God. A victory proclamation came after. A rally of prayers were in line, including the prayers for OFWs, media, movie and film. Rather rare, showbiz personality Pinky de Leon appeared and prayed for the show business. Victory Proclamation led by different churches came after sets of rally of prayers. Intermission numbers were led by Carla Martinez and Ms. Kata Inociencio by singing ‘When You Believe’ of Mariah Carey in English and in Tagalog. Just before ending, Pen Medina of the ‘Bangon Artista’ rose up from his heated seat and faced the audience for a speech. He said that he never believed that GMA did really win the bout, but he believed that God is punishing GMA now for her actions. He, then, told the audience some stories last election. He called for the president’s resignation not tomorrow, not on any date, but today! He also reveals to the public that he have no Christian group to which he belong nor a religion. But, he said, he has a personal relationship with the one, sovereign God.
The rally started at 6.00PM and ended 5.00AM. The program ended with the joint prayer of the Body of Christ for our one great nation.

SOME JEEP-ney STORIES:

I just hate it when you want to sleep and no one let’s you sleep. So instead of exhausting my tired larynx of telling them I need sleep, I gave them a dose of their own medicine!
The jeep, to which we are riding, is composed of three planets – the showbiz, the socialite, and the non-sense. I belong to the socialite and we’re caught in the middle literally. So we have to compete in means of voice intensity.
Our socialite group literally talks about social issues like Ms. Susan Roces’ recent press con. To think the question – “Ms. Susan sino po ang gusto nyong pumalit kay GMA?” Aghast of her answer, she said, “kung kailangan ako, eh di ako. [paraphrased]” My goodness gracious, did she know what she was telling that time? I would prefer the Vice, Mr. Noli, rather than an emotion-derived widow of the nation’s king of movies. And disregarding social issues, we also talked about how to shut the mouths of the people around us. We need dead serious peace.
This one’s serious: We are caught in the middle of the road by a ‘pulis-pulisan’. He said, we’re out of line. Just when did a road rule like that existed? Tell me, Marcos’ huh? It was an order from the president, daw, to go kick some smart-ass when they’re out of the line. The reason? They might be going in the rally and according to the police, it existed when the ‘Hello Garci?’ tape transpired. Oh boy, we’re so dumbfounded about that rule. We can’t stop the driver of the jeep to give bribe just to let him go. They’re sleazy scumbags. Sometime, they’ll pay!
All’s asleep, I’m awake. And I’m not nice enough to let them sleep with such peace! Nyahahahaha! It’s revenge time. Wooooooohoooooo! Let there be noise and wake them all up! That’s what they get for disturbing me a while ago (12 hours ago)

The end of the noose: I’m tired… gotta get enough…

GLORIA REPENT!

2005-07-01T22:26:00.000-04:00

Give us clean hands
Give us a pure heart
Let us not lift our souls
On another

Oh God, let us be
A generation that seeks
Who seeks your face
Oh, God of Jacob

I am on my way back home when I decided to post this message.

We, the Body of Christ (Christians), posed a stand against the government of Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo. No we’re not posing a threat of coup de etat or anything harsh. We rallied thru the Folk Arts Theatre to pray for our beloved nation, the Philippines. The once great nation, demoralized, impoverished, and fooled now. We have to do something about it. We are accountable of whatever happens of this country, why? Because we are the chosen people.

In 1992, Bill Hamon prophecied that we will be the America of Asia by the year 2005 if and only if the people, starting from the government, will be RIGHTEOUS. But how, if the president we have now, had cheated and fooled us during the elections. How can we be the America of Asia, if the head is corrupt. Of course, the body entails the head and we end up being corrupt also. We have a pose for them.

If they still ignore the call to repent and eventually resign from their positions, the God, our creator, will no longer tolerate them and God will be the one to oust them. You, corrupt people who part-take in the previous cheating of the May 2004 elections, repent before God and God will forgive you. Don’t just ignore this. God is serious in His words.
The Lord is preparing a breed of new leaders. Young, idealistic and true to one’s word. Prepare to be ousted, you sleazy TRA-PO. The Lord, who promises us a good future, is moving, and you will have nothing to do with it. To fight with the good agenda of the Lord is vain. YOU ARE NOTHING TO THE SOVEREIGNTY OF THE LORD JESUS CHRIST!

This government needs a total revamp. We, the chosen people of God, need a revamp, and thus, we should also repent of what we have done. God, who is a God of second chances, is ready to forgive us anytime. All He waits for is for you to kneel down at Him and give Him the due respect. Ask forgiveness, for you and I are sinners. If you want this nation to be transformed into a greener pasture that we don’t even need to send OFWs around the globe, we need to change, first of all, ourselves. ‘Cause change comes from within. You can’t change a world, a continent, a nation, a town, a city, a municipality or even your family, if you neglect to ask forgiveness. Ask for clean hands and a pure heart. The Lord our God is starting rebuilding the nation to its greatness again.

The Lord is dressing the nation in an all-white dress that glows from within. Cleansing is all over the nation, and soon, the fulfillment of the prophecy, for us to be the America in Asia. We are close to that, let us not be in the wilderness anymore. Let us catalyze everything.

I ask everyone who reads this letter to pray for our nation everyday. The nation is in a great turmoil, and I know you too feel it. REGARDLESS of our religion, shall we pray for our nation?? I plead to you, please, pray for our nation. God is starting and we should do our part as the Lord does His.

Please reply to this letter, if you have read it. I want to know and to continually encourage you.

FOR GOD’S GREATER GLORY!

PS: For the rest of the program, some of the prominent speakers are:

Bro. Eddie Villanueva
Cong. Joel Villanueva
Mr. Pen Medina
Ms. Pinky de Leon

I must commend Cong. Joel for the exemplary report of what is been going in the Congress. Pen Medina points out deeply the cheating that had happened. Ms. Pinky de Leon for her prayer for the Showbiz industry. And of course, Bro. Eddie Villanueva for the ultimate exhortation for that event. The event was titled – Let God be God! It runs from 6pm, Friday up to 6 am Saturday.

First Day Funk -- delayed!

2005-06-15T15:25:00.000-04:00

THIS IS MY literal first day here at blogspot! But my First Day Funk at school has not started yet.... Why? Let me tell you...

You see... I am trying for a school at US (ahem! I am Filipino) and I didn't enrolled this year at any college here in the Philippines... and that frustrates me... I am BORED... Tired of watching the TV and DVDs. What am I to do?? My First Day Funk is delayed!!!!

My best friend is enrolled at the most prestigious school here -- The University of the Philippines or UP... His course is Broadcast Communication... Although that he says it is really hard at that university, I am desperate to enter the u. It is my dream school after all! I took the exam and guess what? I FAILED! Do you know how it broke my heart when I saw the failure letter of the school? I tore my heart apart and mashed it with it's words --

Sorry, but you failed our entrance exam...

Waaaaaaaaaaaah! And now I accompany my best friend at UP and suddenly my memories will come rushing back to me that I FAILED!!!!

Well, anyways, I accepted it as a real challenge to enter the school. The test is quite a feat but I think It's not the school for me. Months after I took the University of the Philippines College Admission Test or UPCAT, my grandma called me that I have to prepare myself 'cause I will be studying abroad. I think that moment that I will not pass the test since God has permitted such great opportunity for me to study abroad.

I took the Test of English as a Foreign Language and scored 227 in the overall. I am required to have at least 173. After that, I passed my application letter and my personal essay. Few months after, I waited for the Form 1-20 (the one you need to present at the embassy), and certain documents that showed my relatives' support towards my great studying at New York. Oh by the way the school is Hudson Valley Community College of HVCC at Troy, New York. Thus, the begin of my new life...

But waiting is such a boring activity! So I have to do something... But nothing can do but going to school again... Having nothing to do with the madness going on, I am damned to wait 'til September to study again. Man, I missed school, a lot. Some thought school is boring, but that's my typical place other than the bookstore here. So, I just again sit down and watch some stupid programs in the black box. Hopefully, I will have to go to school again....

Oh I almost forgot, I like reading books too, so if anyone would like to recommend a good book, kindly post it here. But, I hate stupid love stories, I like informal essays, satiric compositions, horror and detective stories.

Well, anyways, even though my first day funk at school is delayed, at least, my first day funk here in blogspot has definitely happened.

'Til next time, ciao!!